The habits of being sick

It’s funny how, when you get sick, the things you think matter, like the rules of basic hygiene, somehow no longer apply. They become surprisingly less important when confronted with a stuffy nose, grogginess, aches and pains, overall congestion of the mind, hot flashes, chills, and a continually parched throat. Being clean and living in a clean environment couldn’t be further away from your momentary existence. Dirty dishes pile up. You start to eat several meals out of the same bowl without a second thought. Your body odor takes on the qualities of a natural, earthy scent that may start to attract woodland creatures. The idea of a shower sounds incredibly calming and relaxing. But the thought of your naked flesh touching those first icy drops of water propel you back into a smelly stupor.

So you remain in a state of constant filth and groggy delirium all day. You sneeze into your shirt when a tissue isn’t available. You give yourself permission to create various concoctions that in your mind promise some ameliorative qualities- like hot tea and ice-cream, alternating the hot and cold for throat-soothing purposes; popcorn, because its airy lightness doesn’t do a number on your stomach. You tell yourself you should stay away from dairy, but the chocolate pieces are fine considering the anti-oxidants from dark chocolate are beneficial. You contemplate brushing your teeth, but only, ONLY, if you dare set foot in public (at least have fresh breath even though the rest of you is in dire need of cleaning, pronto).
As you slowly run out of clean glasses, you start drinking hot and cold beverages out of the same coffee mug because it’s the next best thing. You start carrying around a comfy pillow like it’s life support, holding it as you move from couch to kitchen, kitchen to bedroom. You turn to toilet paper when the tissues run out (or even beforehand because you’re in such a state of exhaustion that if you dare reach up for a new box, you may tumble to the floor face first).
Thank goodness no one is around to see you in this “natural” habitat. You run the risk of alienating only yourself. And if your strange, sick-induced habits haven’t done that already, then I think you’re in the clear.